Birth Story Part 2

Tony was busy calling everyone letting them know that we were having a baby today! The doctor came in and we talked about induction. I wasn't dialated or anything, so I would have to be medicated to start labor. There were concerns that due to the baby's size and my BP, we would not tolerate labor well. I opted for a c-section.

That was a really hard decision for me, because I did not want a c-section. I had been imagining my perfect birth, and surgery didn't fit in the picture anywhere. But I had worked so hard, waited so long and hoped and dreamed for this baby and I sure didn't want anything to happen to her. Since I opted for the c-section, the doctor said 'Let's do this!' and I was like 'Right now?!' Yep. Right now. I was admitted to the hospital at 9:46 am. I was prepped for surgery, Tony was brought back, I was cut open and manhandled and then I heard it! The loudest, most pissed of WTF cry I have ever heard. It was beautiful! I immediately started crying and telling Tony to look at her and make sure she was okay. (He was worried about looking over the curtain, he is not a good guts man.)

Eleanor Rose made her grand entrance at 10:26 am only 40 minutes after I was admitted. She weighed in at a whopping 5 pounds, 1 ounce and was 19.75 inches long. She was tiny, but she was healthy as could be! I got to see her briefly and kiss her forehead and say 'Hi baby!' before they took her away so I could be stitched up. Everyone got there just in time for them to wheel her into the nursery. They all missed the birth and my parents were pissed that they didn't get to see me before surgery! (My dad is a worrywart.) Everything went okay though, and it was odd listening the doctors joke about stitches while they were sewing me up.




The first 24 hours after birth are a blur. I was put on medication to keep me from stroking out or seizing and that didn't allow me to breastfeed for the first 36 hours. It had the added benefit of making me sick as a dog. Lovely. I do remember the nurses having to kick my visitors out (twice!) because my BP was too high. I did a lot of snuggling the baby and just staring at her, thinking 'Holy crap I'm this person's mother!'

I learned all the ins and outs of taking care of a newborn and I was waited on hand and foot. (That part was nice!) I had heard from some women that the first postpartum shower was awesome. I wasn't looking forward to it because I could barely walk to the bathroom I was hurting so badly. It was no lie the best shower I have ever taken. It was pure heaven. I even got to eat solid food for dinner that night! I was recovering very well from the surgery and Eleanor was not having any complications so after three days, we were allowed to take our baby home, which is a whole nother terrifying experience.



All in all, my birth experience was the exact and total opposite of the one that I wanted, but all things considered I wouldn't change a thing. We finally got our baby!

Eleanor's Birth Story

So, the baby is here, she's healthy and wonderful and growing like a little weed and everything is where it's supposed to be. Here is her birth story, in two parts. It's lengthy, due to backstory. It's not gruesome or graphic, but viewer discretion is advised!

Around week 27ish of my pregnancy, my blood pressure started creeping up. The doctor was just monitoring me, making sure that it didn't go to high, and switched me to weekly appointments (which was way earlier than expected.) At my next appointment, my BP was through the roof, so I had to go to the lab and do this lovely test where you collect your pee for 24 hours to check for elevated protein levels. Let me tell you, if you've never peed in a jug for a day, you really should try it.

Results came back. Not good news. I was spilling protein, but just a little, so I was going to be monitored super close and do frequent pee buckets. On January 8, I turned in my pee jug and did my blood test. Monday, the 11th, the office called me at work and ordered me home to start strict bedrest until the end of my pregnancy. I was showing signs of preeclampsia, and delivery is the only cure. I was only 32 weeks, so that wasn't really an option at that time. I got 2 steroid shots for the baby's lungs.

Fast forward to February 8 (a whole BORING month of bedrest, twice weekly doc visits & non-stress tests and weekly pee buckets with continually worsening results.)

I went in for my Monday morning NST and ultrasound. The baby hadn't really grown much over the previous three weeks. Worrisome. I went across the way for my NST, and they were awaiting my protein results. Imminent delivery is at a level of 5,000. They told me if I got that high, they were getting that baby out! I was waiting around with Tony for the results, and st 9:45 several people burst into the room, telling me to get across the hall to L&D room 3 NOW. My protein level was 7,500 and my BP was 160something/130something. Stroke territory.

Sporadic Update Time

Ok, I really suck at blogging. I did the same thing when I was a kid. The book fair would roll around once a year, and I'd buy a good, new-smelling diary and vow to write every spare thought in it at least once a day. Well, let's make it every other day. Or once a week. Or month. Oooh, book fair time again! Shiny new diary! You get the picture.

Things on the pregnancy front are very, very good. I feel good, I look good (pat myself on the back, there) and most importantly, the baby is perfect. She (yes SHE!) is growing just like she should be, all parts are present and accounted for. She's doing so well, in fact, that my OB moved my due date up a whole week, so now I'm due on February 28. I'm in my 23rd week this week, and it's really hard to believe that the time is passing so quickly. I figured that being pregnant would drag on, waiting and waiting for the new arrival. Instead, I'm finding out that time is hurtling out of control and I have so much to do and less and less time to do it in!

We've decided on a name, but we're not telling. I thought my family was going to run me out of town because we won't tell the name. I just don't want any comments from anyone before she gets here on what we've decided to name her. We already found out the gender, so we need some element of surprise, right?

Vanishing Twin

I talked my doctor yesterday, I was right. There were two in there! But, it looks like the other baby was measuring really small with no heartbeat. I go for a follow up u/s later this month, just to make sure it 'vanishes' with no complications. My hubby is pretty disappointed. He was excited for twins. As for me, I'm just glad I've got a healthy baby in there. I'm not greedy! One's plenty for me! On the plus side, I'll get lots of ultrasounds to make sure that everything is going okay. I can see my baby more, which is always awesome.

First Ultrasound

I had my first ultrasound yesterday. Let me just start off by saying that this ultrasound was about a million times better than my last one. There's a heartbeat! A superstrong 163 beats per minute. Little peanut measured right on target at 9w2d, and as the tech was pointing out the little legs and the little arms, peanut was waving and kicking and dancing around. I can't express the joy I felt at seeing the little being inside me that was doing just what it should. I'm waiting for the doctor to call with the results of the ultrasound... there was something funny in my uterus that looked suspiciously like another baby. If I don't hear from her by noon tomorrow, I'm going to her office!

Growing Pains

I'm having what I have been assured are normal, natural growing pains in my uterus. And the hurt. A lot. It feels like someone has run a string through my belly button and is pulling it downward persistently. I started to call my doctor, because it hurts, but while I was on hold I thought about how stupid I would sound. "Yeah, doc... my bellybutton hurts. What can you do about that?" So for now, I'm suffering with an ouchie bellybutton and sucker punched guts. As long as my baby is growing like it should, I'll take it!

New Beginnings

It's been a long time since I've updated my blog, mostly because the drudgery of real life took over. One day at a time and all that jazz. After a miscarriage, time temporarily stops. It seems like life may not be worth living when you've experienced a terrible thing. It was hard to get up in the morning, it was hard to see other pregnant women and it was especially hard to see new babies. There are several pregnant women at work at the moment, and one of them is due the day after my original due date.

As my due date draws near, I've got mixed emotions. On one hand, I'm dreading the day because I know it's going to be sad and difficult and heartbreaking, but on the other hand, I'm excited. You see, I'm pregnant again. This time, I'm nervous as hell. Even more so than last time. I had two miscarriages in a row, and I don't know if I can handle a third. I'm taking several medications to try to make this one 'stick' and hopefully they'll do the trick. I'm trying desperately to relax and not overthink every little thing, but it's so terribly difficult. Every cramp, every twinge, every ache... makes me think 'Oh no, not again.' I know that it's very likely I'll miscarry again, especially since there's no telling why I miscarried before and the medications I'm taking are akin to throwing stuff to the wall to see what sticks. I try to be positive, but it's hard to get excited just in case my excitement comes crashing down around my ears again. All I can do is take it one day at a time, I suppose.

The Ending

I had been spotting and cramping since Thursday night, and Sunday morning at 1 am I woke up in excruciating pain. I thought that I could bear it, seeing as how I'd been up the 2 previous nights in pain. I sat on the toilet for almost an hour, doubled over in pain.

Then I started with vomiting and diarrhea, plus the dizziness, so I woke my husband up to take me to the ER. We left the house around 2am, and got right in the ER, they had just hooked me up to the blood pressure and heart monitors, when I looked at the doc and said 'Uh oh something just happened...' He sent me to the bathroom with orders not to flush if anything came out, but it was just blood. I totally soaked the pad that I was wearing, and blood was running out so fast it sounded like I was peeing.

By this time, I was hurting so bad I couldn't even talk, and the contractions were nearly constant, so I knew the end was close. The nurse came to prep me for the pelvic exam, and when I sat up, I felt this odd squelchy feeling, and heard a plop. I looked down and there was a large glob of stuff on the table. The nurse grabbed a collection container and told me to lay back and relax until the doctor came in.

When he did, he looked in the container, and I asked him if that was my baby. He looked a little more and said it was. They gave me the opportunity to look at it, and at first I declined, but then I decided I'd regret it if I didn't get to see my baby. I was shocked at how well developed it was, for as small as it was. It had ten fingers and ten toes, little tiny eyes and ear buds... It looked perfect. They ended up keeping me in the ER for a little while to make sure the bleeding was slowing as it should, and I passed a few more large clots and bits of the placenta, and then it was over. I was in and out of the ER in less than three hours, and we were back home in bed by 5 am.

I've been resting at home, and ordered off work until at least Wednesday. They gave me some good painkillers to help with the cramps, and I feel a lot better emotionally, knowing that it's finally over. The relief is almost palpable, and I feel almost guilty for being more relieved than sad at this moment. I went to my OB today, and she cried with me and hugged me and we talked about my options at the moment... Thankfully, I won't need the D&C, since they're almost positive I passed all the tissue in the ER. She went ahead and ordered the testing, so in a few weeks we'll have some idea what happened.

My husband has been my rock through this horrible time, and I could not have done this without him. He went to work after our appointment this morning, and he's called a half dozen times to check on me today. I love him.

Sad News

Well, I went in for my first ultrasound on Wednesday, and it was not good. The baby quit growing between 8 and 9 weeks, and there was no heartbeat. I am devastated. This baby was a surprise, sure, but it was definitely wanted. Tony is just as upset as I am, and our families and friends are heartbroken. This is a terrible thing that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. I spoke with my doctor this evening, and I go in Monday morning for some more bloodwork and the pre-reg testing for my D&C on Tuesday. I've been bleeding and crampy since last night, and I just hope that it holds off until I get the D&C. I would much prefer having the procedure done than letting nature take its course. More than likely though, I won't have a choice in the matter.

Happy New Year!

It's time to end another year, and I can't say that 2008 has been a bad one.(For me, at least.) The hubster and I have no plans tonight, the girls are staying over at their cousins' house, and we're having a quiet evening at home, thank goodness.

The countdown has begun for our first ultrasound, just one week from today. It's kind of strange but I don't really feel pregnant. I've been extremely lucky in the pregnancy symptoms department and I should be thankful that I've been feeling pretty good but it makes me worry. I'm a worrywart anyway, but I know that I'll feel about a hundred times better once I see the little bean on the US. I've been having terrible nightmares lately, which makes going to bed a chore, and waking up and even bigger chore. Maybe they'll let up once I know everything's going as it should.

I hope everyone has a safe and happy new year and I look forward to updating when I finally have the news!